Time Well…Wasted…

March 2, 2011 at 10:27 am | Posted in change | 4 Comments

So I recently had a birthday, and oddly, that didn’t bother me much. Or at least not so much as I noticed. Today however, I feel very off, melancholy on a day that on its face you wouldn’t think would be that big a deal. It’s my ex-wife’s mom’s birthday. Again, the birthday isnt a huge deal for me as the ex and i have been divorced for a while now and I don’t talk to my ex MIL much if at all.

But it’s what is associated with today specifically, March 2nd, 2011. Ten years ago, we were celebrating my ex MIL’s 50th birthday. It was a fun time and through that I met two people I consider among my best friends.

I think it’s the time that hitting me the most. The marked passage of time. Ten years have gone by. Most of my 20’s and some of my 30’s. Where am I now vs where was I then? If I were to get hit by a bus leaving work tonight, what is my legacy? What did I contribute to the world that I would be leaving behind?

I need to DO something with my life. What would give my life meaning? Actually I know the answer, but I don’t know how to get there. I need to make a decision. How much am I willing to risk? At what point do you live with the life you have vs risking possibly everything for fulfillment?

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4 Comments »

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  1. I don’t know, but I’m totally supporting whatever decision you make from all the way over here. 🙂

  2. I don’t have any advice on the risk part, but I do know it’s never too late to take that 1st step towards taking more control of your future. I was 33 and with a 3 yr old kid when V and I left our jobs to move to PA for me to become a full-time student again. Best decision I ever made. After marrying her, of course…

    • Thanks for the input. I just turned 33 myself. Maybe thats the age of a midlife crisis nowadays lol.


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